You think you know the rules, and then you find out that’s just not the case. I was at the store buying a pack of gum and realized something odd about the guy behind the counter.

It was me.

But it wasn’t. I mean, I’m me. Right?

Anyway, I was talking with my cousin the other day and I noticed he was looking at me funny. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me I looked different. I asked him about something for a party we were throwing for our grandmother and he gave me a puzzled look.

“We already talked about that,” he told me. Which was weird, because it was the first time I had seen him since we decided on doing something nice for her.

I guess the worst was when I went to work. My boss came down the hall and was completely shocked to see me at my desk. He told me to follow him, so I did. He closed the door behind him and asked me to sit.

“You have some big balls coming in here like this,” he said to me. “After the way you acted with everyone last night, and the things you said, for you to come here is pretty appalling.”

He then proceeded to tell me that since I had quit, that I should be leaving now. And that if I returned, I’d be arrested for trespassing.

Two months later, after not being able to find a job, I saw that same guy behind the counter, the one that was selling gum.

He flashed me a grin and said, “Now you know how it feels to be me.”