2008
03.21

Stringrays are slowly taking over the world, killing people off one by one.

Their latest victim was a 55-year-old woman from Michigan that was cruising along in the Atlantic Ocean off of the Florida Keys, minding her own business when an eagle ray jumped out of the water and struck her in the neck causing the woman to fall back, hit her head on the the boat, and die.

Although it’s not clear whether the barb in her neck killed her or hitting her head did, I think it’s safe to say that the stingray is to blame.

Apparently these accidents aren’t as uncommon as most people think.

Crocodile Hunter, Steven Irwin, was killed in late 2006 after a stringray’s barb pierced his chest as he was recording a show near the Great Barrier Reef. A month or so after, a man on a boat also received a barb in his heart. He managed to survive his attack after the doctors successfully removed the barb.

I don’t know what these people did to piss the fish off, but apparently the stringrays are on their side.

  1. I heard on the news today that they eventually ruled that she died of head trauma, not because the stingray itself.

    I bet his stingray posse is laughing at him, saying “YOU FAIL!”