Twice this week, I had work related car issues. First, the battery in my truck died. With no cables, I had to find a place that sold them so I could at least get a jump from somebody. Second, while I was filling up an almost flat tire with air, it exploded in my face. The initial shock of what happened and the ringing in my ears was pretty bad, but I got over it.

Speaking of getting over it, I think it’s funny when someone comes up to me and tells me about how sooo over their ex they are. Over and over. For the past four months, someone I’ve been friendly with at work has been telling me about how he was glad he left her. If you’re really over it, just move on. Pull the neon signs down, put the bullhorn away, and just shut it out of your life. You know, a drunk won’t stop drinking if they keep going to the bar and getting trashed every night…

Christmas is coming and I am in a quandary as to what to get my son. I have a couple of ideas, and I’m sure I’ll share some of them with you down the pike, but I am really looking forward to making this Christmas a good one for my son. I am not for the whole “gift” idea of what the holidays are all about, but I still want to do something for the bugger, you know? Maybe you can give me some ideas, too, as to what to get a 3-year old boy…

The car seems to be giving me no problems. In fact, it’s giving me almost maximum gas mileage - a whopping 33 miles a gallon (it’s designed to give me 35 highway miles a gallon). I’m probably jinxing myself over it, but hey… I’m actually happy with my wheels for once. I miss my Sundance sometimes, but this little green monster has been real good to me so far.

What the Hell is this I hear about Britney Spears getting some kind of “police escort” to get coffee? I want a cop to give me an escort when I go to the 7-Eleven and buy a Slurpee tomorrow. Think it’ll happen? I swear to God, this is a joke. It is a joke, right?

Don’t ask me why, but I find myself drinking more Gatorade lately. I guess it’s better than soda - cold, smooth, wonderful soda - but is it going to help me flush my system? I want to do something what will help with that, and hopefully I’ll start some kind of diet. I hate feeling like I’m carrying a small bag around my waist.

And can we stop with the eating competitions? Okay, I can get a giggle with the hot dogs competition, but the world oyster-opening championship?!? Please. What’s left? World Swedish fish eater championship? Intercontinental Tootsie Roll Toostie Pop licker championship?