I am ready to pick a winner in the upcoming Superbowl. I have spent a whole lot of time thinking about this. I have crunched the numbers, checked the rosters, checked out whose is injured, and even taken a look at long range weather patterns over Jacksonville. Using all this data, I have come to an inexcapable conclusion. Lay down your money, betters, because this is as sure a thing as you are likely to get

Place your money on the undisputed Superbowl winners, DDB Worldwide Chicago, an ad agency that represent Anheuser-Busch. See, Anheuser-Busch and Pepsi have bought over 50% of the Superbowl ad time. In my research, I’ve found that beer companies have a good deal more to spend than soda companies.

Ergo, the company that is getting paid for designing ads is going to make out like a bandit.

This is not to say that Anheuser-Busch will ipso facto be a big winner. Just their ad company.

That is the whole point of running a publicity company. Your job is to convince big companies to buy ads that they really don’t need. You can make a lot of money doing this.

For example, look to your right. See those ads? Somebody convinced someone to buy them and you’re just looking at them for the first time and you are unlikely to ever click on any of them. I’m just saying there is some serious money being given to some marketing wonks for what essentially amounts to “no good reason.”

When I graduated college, they told me I should go into marketing and I said no. I could be living in a twelve bedroom house with a different playmate in each room. Instead, I have a crappy apartment and cats.

Anyhow, hats off to you, DBB Worldwide Chicago! The Superbowl is yours!