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After spending many days among the fat white people of Cape Cod, I followed them upstream to where they spawn: The Big Apple.
This, of course, explains the lack of manners of most of the people I met in the Cape this summer. It also explains why the Cape is so entirely white. That is to say, New York City is especially good at segregating its living areas. For example, Chinatown, Harlem and, of course, Connecticut are each associated with specific ethnic groups.
I would say that a good 60% of the cars driving down Route 6 (the Mid-Cape Highway) had New York license plates. This would also explain all of the New York Yankees gear you can buy on the Cape. Rockgrrl can’t be buying it all is what i am saying here. You can get either Yankees or Red Sox gear almost anywhere on the Cape and the rivalry doesn’t seem to be as fierce since Yankees fans and Sox fans have to live in close proximity. I guess there is some diversity on Cape Cod after all.
Anyhow, New York City itself has the disctinction of being the single most overrated city on the entire planet. Oh! It has theatre! Mostly imported from London or plays about New York City that are only attended by tourists or New York actors. Oh! It has shopping! Unlike every mall in America. Oh! It has old buildings! Tell anyone from Europe, Africa or Asia how cool it is that New York has buildings that are 300 years old and their response will be something like “have you seen our thousand year old structures lately?”
Yes, yes, Los Angeles is overrated, too, but most sane people despise that city while most otherwise rational people can’t get enough of overcrowded, humid or freezing and obnoxious New York City.
Oh, I forgot, they aren’t ‘obnoxious.’ They are ‘colorful,’ which is P.C. for ‘douchebags.’
I am not saying all citizens of New York City are douchebags. I am saying that everyone in America expects the citizens of New York City to be douchebags and, thus, they have a reputation to live up to when dealing with strangers.
The Yankees are a good example of what New York is all about. None of them are from New York or would otherwise hang around with each other, but somebody offered them a job and told them they were a team and, thus, they produce. Indeed, everyone on the Yankees has the same haircut - even the balding members. Then they all go home to their comfortably segregated parts of the city or country and are glad they don’t live near each other. That is New York City to me, in a nutshell.
Really, I am just bitter that they took the colorful porn district and turned it into an area that the Care Bears would be comfortable visiting. Times Square is supposed to be a place that you can get a fake I.D., catch the clap and get arrested for public nudity, not a place you can take the kids for that most heinous of upper class drinks, the frappe. Everyone calls Guiliani a hero and they ignore the fact that he sanitized the one truly interesting thing about the city.
On the positive side, I didn’t get pushed under a subway or get strip searched, so I suppose my visit to the city could be, with some justification, labeled “a success.”
I didn’t come home with the clap, on the other hand, so I would have to honestly report that it was “a qualified success.”
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