Retail Fun

Tax free weekend. I don’t know if it’s a Texas thing or what, but it happens every year right before school starts. Any apparel, shoe, sock, etc under 100 dollars is completely tax free. Rad right? Starting last year, it became the worst fucking 3 days of my life. Let’s explain.



So I’m tucking in shoe laces like a good employee should when a tall blonde lady with a Finish Line bag in her hand walks up to me and says, “I’d like to return these.”
Hilarity ensues.

Conversation: (while walking toward the register area)
Tiffany : What seems to be the problem?
Lady: Well, I love the shoes but I’ve only had them for three weeks and the silver part is coming off.
Tiffany: Oh, really? Would you like to exchange them or do you just want a refund?
Lady: I just want to exchange them.
We reach the counter and she pulls out the shoes. The silver part is indeed torn off.
JuanTon: Wow, did you wash those?
Lady: No, no of course not.
JuanTon: Tiff, go get her another 7 1/2 from the back.
Tiffany heads toward door marked STAFF and gets said shoe. She hears the back end of the conversation between Lady and JuanTon.
Lady: Well I paid one hundred dollars for those shoes and for them to just fall apart like that…
JuanTon: Oh, I understand. We’ll take care of you.
Tiffany: Well Jesus Christ lady, they’re made by 8 year olds, what do you expect?
Awkward silence. JuanTon tries desperately to hold in a fit of laughter. PrettyBlondeGuy behind said lady has no such self control and nearly spits on her. JuanTon exchanges shoes, Lady stares in disbelief and walks away in stunned silence. JuanTon proceeds to punch me in the arm.
JuanTon: You bitch. She’s probably going to go donate some money to charity.




When I tried out for cheerleader at the end of my sophomore year, it raised more than a few eyebrows. If you’ve ever had the pleasure of my company in “REAL LIFE” you know that I am not the cheerleader type at all. When the voting came around (yes, it’s a big popularity contest with some judges thrown in to make it seem legit) it wasn’t a shocker that I wasn’t one of the chosen ones. I wasn’t really upset by the news that I wasn’t going to get to prance around in a skirt, I was more upset by the fact that I wasn’t “good enough” at something.